When Teachers Decide To Mix Classes

Finding Out Classes For Next Year

I realise I am in a highly hormonal state right now, being 8 months pregnant is never good when emotions are concerned. I have been crying every day for the past couple of weeks for no real reason, sometimes for happy things, sometimes for sad – but either way a huge overreaction on my part each time.

Today the school released the classes for next year and so, with all the other parents, I eagerly awaited the news at the school gate. Over the last year, Little G has made some lovely friends in nursery and I too have made some great friends with the mums. Not so long ago I felt as though I would never make any friends but the last couple of months have seen friendships develop – even to the point that those mums have been a true support for me, helping to pick up G from school when I just couldn’t walk there and back.

So we waited, waited to hear whether our children would be kept together or not. We had been told that the classes they are in from September will remain for the next 7 years until they go to secondary school- that is a long long time. The gate was opened and the children were called. Pack after pack was opened as the children filed out, purple, purple, purple, purple…. until my little girl skipped out to greet me with her pack. Red.

Gutted.

The thing is, I’ve been on the other side of that fence. I have been the teacher choosing which child would go where. Except I always felt I was fair. I felt that I paired children together so they had at least one friend, not just based on ability and gender. We always made sure there was a proper mix too but her school seem to have kept her class together on the whole, simply swapping over 2 or 3 children from the morning session.

I know the teachers have probably created a ‘fair’ class in their eyes, one that is based on ability and behaviour, but I feel a little cheated. Why have those 2 and 3 children been moved away from the rest of the class? Why, of the 5 girls in the friendship circle, has G been isolated?

The thing is with Little G is that she is a friend to everyone, so they probably felt she could manage wherever she was put. But still, to split her away from the main group of girls, those she plays with outside of school? Just seems a little mean to me and in my hormonal emotional state I can tell you now, I am devastated.

I am devastated for her, for the loss of friendships she could have had- those that would have carried her to Secondary school (an all girls school at that). For the birthday parties she will miss out on now… ‘mummy why aren’t I going to so and so’s party?’ ‘Sorry my darling, you aren’t in their class and they can’t invite everyone’. I can’t bear that conversation, I don’t ever want her to feel left out.

I am also upset for me, for the mums that have rallied around me, to lose them. Because as much as we can all pretend that we will stay friends, I don’t think it will happen, maybe not at first but they will diminish over time. 7 years of birthday parties and playdates that will never happen. 7 years of new friendships with new kids and their parents. I love the mums in the class as it is right now, I don’t want to have to start again.

So that is today. And yep, I am hormonal and the rational side of me tells me it will be ok, that she will make new friends and that those other mums will turn out to be ok after all. But for today, I am sad and I angry at her teacher. She may have felt she made the right decision for the class but for me and my little girl, nope, not the right decision at all.

my sig 2016

7 Comments

  • Reply
    Mini Travellers
    June 28, 2016 at 5:17 pm

    Ah my lovely, I am waiting with baited breath for the class lists too, and whilst my issue will be different to yours, I totally know how you feel. xxx

  • Reply
    Louise (Little Hearts, Big Love)
    June 28, 2016 at 5:30 pm

    Sending you big hugs my lovely, I can imagine just how upsetting this must be. I am sure that Little G will make lots of lovely friends in her new class but that might not be much consolation for you right now. Hugs xx

  • Reply
    Angela at Daysinbed
    June 28, 2016 at 7:00 pm

    Sorry to hear this. These things can be so testing at times. Sylvia’s class was split last year and they made a year 2 year 3 and a mixed 2/3. I was so relieved that she was not int he mixed class and got to stay with the majority of her friends. It’s a tough one. Angela from Daysinbed

  • Reply
    Sian QuiteFranklySheSaid
    June 28, 2016 at 11:14 pm

    Is there anything you can do if it really is such a bad decision? 🙁 By the way were you at the new intake meeting today? I was there, but didn’t spot you. But then again I wasn’t looking as assumed I wouldnt know anyone! x

  • Reply
    Vickie
    June 29, 2016 at 12:27 pm

    I know how you feel Katy. We had the induction meeting at Bubs’ school a couple of weeks ago and most of her friends are in another class. She will have three preschool classmates with her but not the ones she usually plays with, and naturally I won’t be with the mums I normally chat to. It’s so frustrating when we have no say in the matter and it does sometimes feel like it was done on purpose, even if that’s not the case.

    Hopefully Little G will settle in well and over time new friendships will be made for both of you.

  • Reply
    Donna
    June 29, 2016 at 10:28 pm

    Athena was in the same situation at the start of the year – all of her friends in the other class but now, nearly a year on she’s so happy and has so many friends. Don’t worry Katy, I cried at the time but she was oblivious and it’s all good now x

  • Reply
    Jules Pondering Parenthood
    July 1, 2016 at 1:06 am

    As Donna says, I’m sure Little G isn’t concerned and as, like you, I have been on the other side of the class organisation scenario I’m sure the teachers had good reason to place her, and the other children, where they did. There’s no reason why the girls can’t remain friends, despite being in different classes.

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