Am I A Good Enough Mum?

Motherhood: What Makes A Mum?

I was chatting with the lovely Sian (Quite Frankly She Said) the other day and the chat turned to the fact neither of us feel old enough to be mums. We were saying how we don’t feel any different to when we were at school. Do you feel that way sometimes?

I turn 32 in a couple of months, so am no spring chicken, and yet I feel pretty much the same as I did when I was about 14. Just the other day I was at my mum’s house, sitting on her sofa while she made me a tuna sandwich. Besides the fact I have a few (or quite a few) grey hairs and wrinkles, I could have been transported back in time to when I lived at home- I didn’t feel any different!

Of course I am a grown up- my age tells me so. My mum was in her 30s when she had me and I always looked at her as being a grown up (and a little bit old). So is that how my girls view me? Am I grown up to them? Am I old? Probably!! The other day Little G called me mummy, nothing out of the ordinary of course, but for the first time I really heard it. I am a mummy! But what makes me a mummy?

I love my children with all my heart. I think that is the main thing that makes me a mum. That overwhelming love that you feel for your children, there really is no love like it in the world. Only a mum would understand.

I put my children first, always. There are days when I don’t even have time for a shower because it took an extra hour to create an artistic masterpiece with Little G or LJ will refuse to leave my side for one second. A shower can wait, they can’t, and I don’t mind.

I am the one they run to when they are upset. I think this is one of my favourite things about being a mum- being the one they choose over everyone else. I am the one they need to make it all better and I hope that never changes.

I worry about them all the time. I am a natural worrier but my goodness, having kids makes you step it up a notch doesn’t it? I just want them to be happy and healthy always, it makes me feel sick to know I cannot control it all.

They love me unconditionally. Of course I love them, but they love me too. No matter what, they love me. That is the most amazing feeling in the world.

Whether I feel old enough to be a mum doesn’t really matter. When I became a mum to my two little girls I took on a new role, a new facet to my whole being. My girls are my entire world and I am theirs- that qualifies me for the job. I doubt I will ever feel like a real grown up, even when I am in my 80’s – age is just a number and I will still just be me, with a few more wrinkles 🙂

How about you? Do you have moments of wondering whether you are old enough

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  • Reply
    Maria (one tiny leap)
    January 7, 2016 at 11:20 am

    I loved this post! I feel like this every day, I can barely believe it is me who is responsible for this little child! I don’t think I’ve knowingly grown past the age of 22, and I’ve always felt like a slight fraud when saying my age after that…! x

    • Reply
      January 27, 2016 at 10:36 am

      Haha I know what you mean, I certainly don’t feel 32!! x

  • Reply
    Leigh - Headspace Perspective
    January 7, 2016 at 8:16 pm

    Gosh you are SUCH a spring chicken Katy! I turn 40 next year…age is completely relative, there are times I think about my age and think “bloody hell!” because when I was younger 40 seemed so old but I don’t feel old (because I’m not). I think the only thing that concerns me about my age is its another risk in conceiving and being pregnant with a little brother or sister for Hugo xxx

    • Reply
      January 7, 2016 at 8:18 pm

      Ah Leigh, those worries would be there at any age when you have been through something like that. And I agree, you most certainly are not old- in fact you are younger than me! I am like an 80 year old haha!! xx

  • Reply
    Katie @mummydaddyme
    January 7, 2016 at 9:01 pm

    My husband and I joke about this all the time, we both don’t feel old enough at all, even though he is 37 and I am 31! x

  • Reply
    Sian @ QuiteFranklySheSaid
    January 8, 2016 at 12:41 am

    I don’t feel old enough but I sure do look it haha! I used to think that being 30 was ancient xx

    • Reply
      January 27, 2016 at 10:33 am

      Haha no you don’t!!! x

  • Reply
    You Baby Me Mummy
    January 9, 2016 at 9:24 am

    I am 39 this year and still feel like I am in my 20s, everyone seems to be living adult lives and I feel like when I grow up I will too! Ooops, xxx

    • Reply
      January 27, 2016 at 10:32 am

      Haha no I am the same Aby!! We will be grown ups one day! 🙂 x

  • Reply
    January 9, 2016 at 10:49 am

    I’ll be 36 this year. 36!! I honestly don’t feel any different inside and can remember school and all my teachers and friends etc as though it were yesterday.

    As you know I had Lewis when I was only 18 oh my goodness Kate, at the time it used to wind me up so much when people would say I wasn’t old enough. Actually it was so hurtful because they would look at you and you can tell they are thinking you idiot, your life is over. BUT I did ok, and holly arrived a year later when I was 19, it was so hard but I managed and they’ve turned out so well. When I look back I definitely wasn’t old enough but I coped because that’s what we do.

    Lovely post, has made me reflect 🙂 xxx

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