Sometimes It All Gets A Little Too Much

Over the last few days I have slowly become more and more down in the dumps. To be honest I don’t even know why, nothing has happened to make me feel that way and yet I feel myself feeling more and more unhappy. I get this way every now and then and it takes a huge amount of effort to pull myself back into my normal happy self. But when I get like it, nothing will do. I look at my life and feel as though I don’t have enough, the house is too small, we don’t have enough money and we can’t afford nice things.

It is my own doing, I gave up my job to stay at home with the girls and with that came sacrifices. I knew that and still do, and yet I get times when it all gets a little too much. I see my Instagram feed full of lovely things and it crushes me. I read other blog posts, with tales of this, that and the other and it makes me feel inferior. My blog itself causes me more stress as I constantly feel second best, second rate, just not good enough.

I have days like these and then I have days like today when I wake up to myself, kick myself up the bum and get on with it. Because actually I am pretty lucky, I have a lovely husband who buys me flowers to cheer me up. I have a daughter who makes me so proud and another who’s smile lifts me every time. As I write this LJ is snoring away next to me, full of cold due to more teeth, her little grunts are a sign of contentment, she is happy- I am everything she needs.

Our house isn’t perfect, far from it, but it is our house. We are making it our own bit by bit and after a long day it is where we hang our hats, the place where we are safe together as a little family. We don’t have lots of money but we have each other and I really need to remember that more. Spending my life wanting more will mean I waste my life missing out on everything I do have. I need to stop.

Sometimes it all gets a little too much, but then I stop and take a longer look and it is ok again. I will have my down days, sleep deprivation and a blogging list as long as your arm will do that to you, but in the end I always see the good. When I was little I didn’t lust after big houses or fast cars, all I ever wanted was to be a mummy- I have that and more, so I need to sit back and enjoy it all. They love me and that is all that really matters.

Right, I should probably go get on with the housework while this one is still asleep.

LJ asleep

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Comments 18

  1. Bless you Katy – Big hugs from me. I totally know where you are coming from. There are times when I feel exactly the same (right now as it happens!) and everything does feel too much. I really just can’t wait to get away on holiday. I know how hard I’ve worked to earn the money to pay for it, and it couldn’t come at a better time! Keep fighting the good fight lovely xxxxx

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  2. You have described exactly how I feel myself sometimes – it’s nice to know I am not alone! Well done to you for managing to turn it around and see everything in a different light to make yourself feel better! 🙂 xx

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      Thank you so much for commenting, you are definitely not alone. Sometimes a step back and a closer look at life makes the world of difference xx

  3. Oh I hear you and I empathise. I did the same, took time out and sometimes it does all seem a bit of a struggle when others are moving on & doing amazing things. But your amazing things are your children and that’s so important. You say you gave up your job but you didn’t you swapped your job- unfortunately this one doesn’t get paid!
    I find when I get like this I just need to go out for a walk or bike ride, to clear my head, and then start all over again.
    Love & hugs coming to you
    xx

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      I have been tidying my house and that made me feel so much better- tidy house tidy mind! Thank you so much for commenting xx

  4. I totally feel this way sometimes. I get frustrated that I can’t work and earn a living while my daughter is in school and see blogging as the only possibility and I dream of earning a living and one day owing a house. That would be so wonderful. Sometimes I see what other bloggers do and achieve and I think wow. It’s something for me to aspire to and work towards but as you say Blogging is such hard full on work and do have to work endless hours, sleepless nights and it takes a toll, especially when the results don’t come straight away….and then we have our darling children and to remind us why we do it, so we can potentially give them a better life and that hopefully is enough to keep us motivated and doing what we need to do!

    Angela x

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      You are so right, my girls are the very reason for my being and so I will keep going and aim higher. Thanks for commenting hun xxx

  5. I think we all feel this way sometimes. I know I have. It’s hard not to feel jealous over other people’s lives with their perfect homes and their amazing achievments but we must remember that we’re only seeing the shiny, sparkly side that people want us to see. What we’re not shown are the arguments, the messy floors, the tantrums and the bags under the eyes of the blogger who gets to bed after midnight every night. The grass isn’t always greener, it’s just been Photoshopped. 🙂

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  6. Sending you hugs Kate x You must stop comparing yourself to others – just focus on all your achievements and all that you have to be proud of.

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  7. Katie if you have a blogging list as long as your arm then you are not unsuccessful or inferior, stop comparing yourself to others no good ever comes of it, be happy to be wonderful you x

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  8. Oh Katy, I’m so glad you feel able to share this on your blog and know that you will get support. You’re definitely not alone, I think it’s perfectly natural and normal to have those days where you feel no matter what you do it’s never enough – I know I do. Funnily enough it’s the reason I do my weekly catch ups because it reminds me that all the things I often think are mundane are actually the special moments. I love you blog and hope to meet you one day, you’re doing great! X

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